IF MY BODY WERE A CAR

If my body were a car, this is the time
I would be thinking about trading it
in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and
scratches in my finish and my paint
job is getting a little dull, but that's
not the worst of it. My headlights are out of focus and
it's especially hard to see things up
close. My traction is not as graceful as it
once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump
into things even in the best of weather. My whitewalls are stained with
varicose veins. It takes me hours to reach my
maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently. But here's the worst of it -- Almost every time I sneeze,
cough or sputter.....either my radiator leaks
or my exhaust backfires!